It is I once again, reporting in after a jaunt along the beach! I needed a break from investigating this list of Historical Landmarks, and the stretch from Santa Monica to Venice Beach is one of my favorite places for a break in all of Southern California! The area offers the quiet and serenity of the cycling waves and the vibrancy and energy of the bustling masses of people! It’s one of the main reasons I love living here!
 |
 |
I like to start at the north end of Pacific Palisades Park, where the parking is free and always available (except after 6 on Fridays). There is a beautiful path that winds toward the pier for about half a mile, passing joggers, dog walkers, yogis, painters, and homeless people taking naps on the benches. Plus, when you’re close to the beach, you don’t have to apologize to your lungs for every breath you take, at least once you’ve passed the PCH, which runs beneath a portion of the bluffs.
 |
 |
The path concludes at the Santa Monica Pier, also the last stop on historic Route 66. Here, be dazzled by the eclectic street performers! Caress—nay, make love to—your ego with the help of countless artisans ready to draw your face, sculpt your face, paint your name, or write it on a grain of rice, and they’ll make you such a deal! At the end of the pier, if you can stand the high pitched fog signal/teenager repellent, you get uninterrupted glimpses of the world’s largest ocean! Well, normally, you would, but this time there chanced to be an ominous fog bank roaring in from the west. It enveloped the pier like a giant sea slug, and all was lost… for about ten minutes.
 |
A key attraction on the pier is Pacific Park, an amusement park built onto the pier itself, as featured in one of my favorite movies, Bean! Nonetheless, I decided to skip the park today and head for the sands, past the big kids’ playground, where I’ve frolicked a time or two, and a mile south to the Venice Beach Boardwalk.
 |
At Venice Beach, with its lines of trinket vendors and pot shops, it is not uncommon to find yourself face-to-face with tree men, extraterrestrials, and folks in Speedos who should never have or ever again set foot outside in a Speedo. It’s a slice of Weird Heaven, but no trip to Weird Heaven would be complete without a peek inside the Venice Beach Freakshow!
 |
I’ve been to the Freakshow twice, and it is worth every one of your five dollars! The first time, I witnessed a man staple a $20 bill to his tongue. Ew! This time, Rubber Girl/Electric Lady sat in an electric chair, which allowed her to light a lighbulb with her hand and ignite the firebreather’s torch with her tongue! (I hope she’s given some thought to crimefighting!) To follow up, the world’s second (by four months) youngest professional sword swallower devoured two swords and an inflated balloon! Oh! And the coup de grace came from a meet and greet with Larry Gomez, a.k.a. “the Wolf Boy!” Larry has hypertrichosis, which means his skin is so sensitive to sunlight that it sprouts hair just about everywhere! He actually has the Guinness World Record for being the world’s hairiest man! I asked if I could take his picture outside the venue, but I caught myself. We all ask dumb questions sometimes.
 |
 |
If all this seems too incredible to believe, come see for yourself! Sunday afternoons are my favorite for a stroll from Santa Monica to Venice, but really any day deserves a good wandering. It’s too bad I’ve never seen George here. He used to love walks. Anyway, I’m off to plan the next adventure!
Onward and northward!
P.S. Did you know that Santa Monica is named after Santa Monica of Hippo? There are two springs near the city that the Tongva tribe used to call Kuruvungna, and when the Spanish missionaries arrived and couldn’t pronounce “Kuruvungna,” they decided to call the springs something else. At first, they were called “San Gregorio” and “El Berendo,” until at last, someone decided the springs were like the tears of Santa Monica crying over her hedonistic son, Augustine!